Recently, I brought my 3 year old out for a meal at a nearby eatery. After paying, I got back 50 cents in loose change, one 10 cents coin and two 20 cents coins. My toddler wanted to hold on to the coins. Knowing that he is excitable and easily distracted, he would probably lose the coins.
At first, I resisted wanting to ensure that the coins are kept safely. Then I realised that this is a good opportunity to teach responsibility. So I let him be. True enough when I reach home. One 20 cents coin is missing. (OK... So I got what I expected - that he will lose the coins). I was all ready to go into the lecture for Responsibility 101 and wanted to explain about the need to be responsible with the things that we are entrusted with.
Just when I opened my mouth ready to deliver the "lecture", a thought hit me like a ton of bricks. There is a greater opportunity here. A golden opportunity to build my kid's self esteem.
"Where are the coins?" I asked.
He opened his hands and a look of surprise and disappointment swept across his faced. He looked at me and said one is missing apprehensively.
"Oh.... We started with three coins and now you have two left?" I asked.
"... Yes ..." He replied.
"Wow! Great effort. You manage to keep two coins safe! Next time let's try again to bring back all. Good job!"
He paused for a while. Placed the remaining two remaining coins into his crocs shoe. One in each shoe. Saying he want to keep them safe there.
So in conclusion. There is a couple of ideas here.
- Choosing to focus on the coins that we have instead of the coin that was lost.
- Choosing to talk to him about what he done well (in bringing back two coins) will help to lift his self esteem in the long run.
Hope this help you in lifting your child's self esteem should you find yourself in a similar situation.
Cheers and Happy Parenting.
